| You're a stranger, so what do I care? |
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| Wake up sleepyhead, it's happening without you. As this year draws to an end, all I can do is stand back and watch myself spiral out of control. I won't even bother with the resolutions, because the only resolution that I'll have is to break all the resolutions that I'll carefully lay down, deliberately. It's funny how people generally grow up to be more responsible than their adolescent selfs, but everything seems to happen in reverse for me. Maybe 16 years of futilely trying to be a people, or at least parent, pleaser, has eroded whatever will and spirit I had in me. It's somewhat like watching a freak highway accident happening in slow motion. Just that there won't be any crashes happening anytime soon, at least not yet. But I have to admit, feeling empty a way better alternative than feeling morose. These bouts of callousness and recklessness arrived just a few years too late. And there's no more room for follies, which I'll inexorably make. Just like how everyone fucks up their life occasionally. But just like car crashes, they all differ in severity. |
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| 1. Denial and isolation
2. Anger
3. Bargaining
4. Depression
5. Acceptance |
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| "Who am I if I'm alone?
I hardly exist at all
Let's pretend that we don't need
Anything anymore from anyone
I don't want to feel anything anymore
Let's just pretend."
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